He may have the following questions:1. “And actually, who’s here?”2. “What’s he doing here?”3. “What right did he have to host here?”4. “How much longer can this last?”5. “How to quickly get rid of him?”
New father must try promptly and available to answer the child on these issues. The main rule: we must respond with action. Show the firmness of his own position through his actions. The total content of the answers to the above questions may look something like this:
1. Let the child know about what You are doing. It is possible that Your job seems fascinating. In this case, start unwinding the ball of his distrust of You from this thread. Take him to his job if sure that he or she wishes. There the child can meet people who appreciate You for Your talents and gifts. Unobtrusive show him what You get the most successfully. In this case let the child understand that if he wants, he himself, when he grows up he can do even better.
2. It is important that the child did not have any doubts as to the authenticity and seriousness of Your feelings and intentions towards his mother. Show that with Your arrival the importance of the child not will change. Just before his loved mother, grandmother, grandfather, and now he, at least, a great friend.
3. Let the child understand that his mother made a choice. Her decision should be respected. The mother gave life, and all these years, she alone had to cope with difficulties. Let the child will be motivated to move towards You. To do this, each step in establishing a relationship You should value themselves and not to stand still.
4. Emphasize that intend to participate in a child’s life to just the extent in which he wants to. Ask him about future plans, about desires, about what he is unhappy. Try to speak with him frankly. Discuss topics of interest to him. Tell us what you are passionate about yourself. Indicate his own desire to remain in the new family forever.
5. To get rid of You quick and easy can be very simple: if he would respect his own mother You, to study well, to be freed from bad habits… You will not be in any way disturb him to live because of this behavior, he will soon grow wings and he will fly to where do not interfere with any step. While he is an ordinary child and the best You can offer is genuine concern and maybe even love.
The stepfather is more likely to be well received by the child if:1. Not contradict himself and does what he promised.2. Constantly exposed to the child.3. Not trying to say that it is somehow better than a child.4. Sincerely cares about his life and problems.5. Respects the child and understands him.
Finally, the five rules for a child to he easily lived with a stepfather:1. Get to know him closer.2. Talk to him.3. Try to understand him.4. Please respect it.5. Appreciate it.